Fuel Your Masculinity With Ambition
I am sure you have heard that today’s men are facing a crisis of purpose. Studies show that the rate of male dropouts is rising, even worse, male suicide rates are also on the rise. As of 2017, on average, men have around a 17% higher suicide rate than women. (NIH)
We are in a time where men are uncertain about what to do with themselves. Men are creatures that are built to protect, conquer and dominate. Our ancestors were hunters. They had a purpose, to provide for their tribe and keep everyone alive. This is why you exist today.
Today, there are no urgent needs for men anymore. We are so privileged compared to our ancestors that we do not have to worry about survival. The core reason our ancestors hunted, conquered and fought was to simply survive. Death is one hell of a motivator.
In modern western society, most of us have no need to worry about food, clothing or shelter; the three necessities for life. Unlike our ancestors, we do not have death to motivate us to compete and win, but that instinct is still in our DNA. So what do we do with it?
All men need to be ambitious to develop their masculine core. This is not necessarily a matter of career or money, but, as Jordan Peterson puts it, "adopting responsibility". Taking responsibility of yourself first, and then making positive impacts in the lives of those around you.
PURPOSE AND DRIVE
Ambition gives a man’s life purpose. Imagine you lived at the time of our ancestors and you had to join the men risking their lives to go hunt. What would you do?
Imagine you had the weight of the lives of your family and tribe on your shoulders. That's a lot to be responsible for, but it gives you meaning; a reason to get up in the morning.
Ambition gives life purpose, and purpose gives a man the drive and motivation to tackle the hardships of life.
"It's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential." - Barack Obama.
When you are ambitious, you have something you want to accomplish; a target you want to hit. Your vision narrows towards that goal, similar to our hunter ancestors. You ignore anything in your life that will hinder you getting to that goal. These include anyone negative that drags you down or any unsuccessful habits.
When you are driven, you see each day as an opportunity to get closer to your goal. You appreciate and cherish those around you who support you. You are grateful for the life you have. You are excited to get up in the morning. You begin to see the many positive things in your life, and this helps you to tolerate and confront life’s hardships.
Ambition builds a man’s confidence. As you move towards your goal, you will inevitably be faced with many challenges. These are basically mini-bosses designed to test whether you have what it takes to go on to the next level. As you defeat these mini-bosses and level up, it raises your confidence. The reason is that you just accomplished something you did not think you could, or maybe even failed at in the past. Imagine how you felt when you beat a super difficult level in a game or completed a difficult project with time to spare. It is an ecstatic feeling! We feel good because we are fueling our masculinity, and feeding the conqueror in us.
As I mentioned, your ambition is a responsibility to yourself and those around you. As you evolve, and your focus becomes more accurate, do NOT neglect your relationships. Your success is not just for you, but also for those people that help and support you. Always remember to be humble and selfless. Here is an awesome article by Scott H. Young on how to be selfless and ambitious.
A phrase most dating coaches tell their clients is, “always have a mission”. What this means is a man should have a goal that is of a higher priority in his life than simply chasing women. Many men put the value of their self-worth in the hands of random women. Ambitious men do not put women on pedestals because they need to be very selective with the people they let into their lives.
"We are the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with" -Jim Rohn (Motivational Speaker).
A man responsible for building an empire faces greater challenges than approach anxiety, so approaching women for him is child's play. Having a mission puts life into perspective, allowing you to make the right decisions.
No one wants to be mediocre, everyone wants to achieve greatness, but most people do not understand what it means to be great. We are so enticed by the glamour, the fame or the money of that lifestyle that we fail to comprehend the amount of sweat, tears, and sacrifices that the great ones had to endure.
Nothing worth achieving will be easy, and if you expect them to be you are deluding yourself.
Our society praises results more than effort, and even undervalues the efforts of successful individuals. The kid that gets the top scores is often seen as being “born smart”, having rich parents that pay for tutors, or something outside that kid's control that contributed to his intelligence.
We believe we work as hard as the top people, therefore their exceptional success has to be a result of factors we do not have access to. The ugly truth is that the majority of them have worked harder, endured a lot, and sacrificed more.
If you have a goal worth pursuing, you will endure. You will have to because the alternative result will frighten you more than what you would have to endure. Do not give excuses to yourself for not adopting some responsibility, because once you start giving excuses it will make your life seem further and further out of your control. You need to develop a no-excuses mentality as described here by Order Of Man.
Being ambitious and adopting responsibility may seem obvious, but since it is a difficult path most men would rather delay it for as long as they can. You are not a man until you are willing to adopt some responsibility, if for nothing else but your own life, until then you are still a boy.
We can choose to remain boys forever, maturation is not necessarily based on logic nor emotions, but rather on the values and principles we choose to uphold.
"Great ambition is the passion of a great character. Those endowed with it may perform very good or very bad acts. All depends on the principles which direct them." - Napoleon Bonaparte